Did you know that you have two murder weapons dangling from your chest? In what was described as a “boozed up trailer park fight” by officials, Donna Lange, 51 smothered her boyfriend to death with her killer boobs. Even though he pleaded for his life, he was rushed to the hospital and couldn’t be revived. I have several comments on this:
1. At 51-years-old, if your jugs are still bouyant and full enough to smother a man to death, then you are doing something right (my guess is that something is eating).
2. I can’t speak for half the population, but in my little gay mind, death by motor-boating seems like the ideal way for a straight guy to meet his maker.
3. Of all the causes of death that come to mind, choking on an areola doesn’t seem that bad. What really gets to me is the sheer amount of boob sweat that Donna probably generated. Suffocating on a tit is one thing, but drowning in under-boob juice is another issue, entirely.
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