I was lucky enough to be around my sister during the last weeks of her first pregnancy, and by lucky, I mean that I lived through it. By the time you are ready to pop, pregnancy becomes much less of a cutesy, fun-fest of presents and planning and more of a hemorrhoidal nightmare of epic proportions where even the thought of ever being skinny or happy again seems like a distant dream. Needless to say, I am pretty happy guys can’t get pregnant, but for those of you who can, here are 10 strange ways to induce labor. My sister probably tried all of these, but she was so stressed out at that point her cervix and vagina made a pact to heal over just to show her who was boss.
Bumpy car ride- Also called the shake and bake. Best experienced in a car that was made before shock absorption was perfected.
Orgasm- Obviously doing the same thing that got you into this mess might get you out of it.
Castor Oil- Diarrhea and vomiting are two side effects, but is that really anything new at this point?
Acupuncture- Sticking things into your body could potentially result in other things coming out, right? Newton’s law?
Walking- The more innovative, groundbreaking idea of all time.
Nipple stimulation- I am sure your baby daddy or husband would be willing to help with this, even if your nipples are currently the size of dinner plates.
Balsamic vinegar- If this were true, I would go into labor every time I eat at Just Salad.
Glass of wine- Any excuse to drink is a good excuse in my book.
Chinese food- If the thought of it doesn’t make you gag, you should eat up while you still have an excuse growing in your utesy.
Kneeling on all fours- Again, trying the same thing that got you into this mess might get you out of it.
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