How come no one warned me not to mix tequila and vodka?
Chew with your mouth closed. It’s disgusting.
I don’t like being invited to events on Facebook. If it’s a cool enough event you don’t invite people through Facebook. Come on.
It’s the greatest thing to wake up next to a boy you like in bed. Yes, I had a good weekend thank you very much.
Words not to use as adjectives: Hella, mad, gnarly, dope, cool beans, yummy, amaze-balls, etc.
My mom got me a Chanel wallet on a chain for Chanukkah and I only wear it on special occasions. But I think I’m going to start wearing it more. I don’t want to die next week and from heaven be thinking, “F**k I should have worn that Chanel more.” #notsohumblebrag
Listen to this song and it will make your day so much better.
Only date guys who are taller than you.
Never have unprotected sex with someone who you aren’t seriously dating. Wait, actually just never have unprotected sex. Unless you’re married or want kids.
“If you don’t like something, change it. If you can’t change it, change your attitude.” Maya Angelou