Remember when Fashion Week was cool?

Remember when Fashion Week in NYC was super cool?

I posted this on facebook last night and got mixed reviews. A bunch of my friends chimed in with “hasn’t been since it was at Bryant Park,” while others claimed it was never cool. The truth is, it peaked around 2007 (along with the economy), when Midtown would fill with an eclectic mix of bougie trust fund bitches, Lower East side hipster types (before that movement completely moved to Brooklyn), designers, models, and people lining up at doors with no chance of getting in to the shows or the after parties. Somewhere around 2009 all that took a drastic turn for the worse. Maybe it was the damp economy fending off all the “good” people, but it seemed the doors just swung open to anyone. It was as if the moat gate could suddenly be accessed with the words “yeah, I buy clothes sometimes… I’m totally into fashion” and then you and six of your closest sleepaway camp friends would be sitting with Jason Wu at an after party in a boutique hotel basement.

Don’t get me wrong– I’m all for inclusion. I love that straight men have often been willing to include me in their sporting game outings I’ve never given a damn about, but, the nature of the human existence game is a hierarchy. When the hierarchy fades away in the fashion scene, well, that’s something like Style Socialism. Style Socialism, I assume, should be left in the hands of Russian models or other people more familiar with how that whole system works.

But here we are, presenting Fall 2014 looks in Lincoln Center and the surrounding area, and I can’t be bothered to even show up. I live within walking distance of the tents, and still, I’d rather receive my images and intel via email as if I was writing from Los Angeles, or New Zealand or somewhere else impossibly inconvenient. What’s worse? Showing up to the shows this year has become so decidedly uncool that I don’t know more than a handful of people going (and for the most part, those I know are paid makeup artists or the product sponsors).

So I wonder, NYC girls, what’s next? There’s no Fashion Week left to look forward to… where do you land now? Some possible next stops:

• lobbying the return of Fleet Week (slut-shaming is out of style, so it’s acceptable to go for it now)
• focusing on fashion-themed charities with ridiculous names like “Help Malnourished Murray Hill Infants Wear Ralph Rucci”
• passing fabric reform bills to outlaw Lycra
• moving Fashion Week to Newark, NJ… because Cory Booker agreed to autograph the teeny tiny breasts of all the models in attendance

Perhaps most importantly, where does all the first and third quarter PR money go now?!

…Thoughts? Share below.