Seattle officials are trying to clean up the accidental gum wall.
I’m not a lesbian, so I have never been to Seattle, but I can tell you that I love anything bright-colored, sticky, or both. That is why I am taking it so personally that officials in Seattle are trying to wipe away their infamous gum wall.
The gum wall at Pike Place Market started gaining steam around 1993, when customers of the Market Theater started sticking gum, pennies, and other trash onto a particular wall. Workers tried to curtail the mess, but eventually gave up and deemed it a tourist attraction.
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Later this month, at least 1 million pieces of old gum will be steamed off, and people will have to start fresh, which they undoubtedly will do.
A Pike Place Market representative has stated that they are trying to save the brick, because the sugar and chemicals aren’t good for the wall, but I ask these officials to consider the sense of historical preservation.
The saliva and DNA of millions of people is on that wall. One day it may hold the key for future scientists to discover what slovenly, disgusting assholes we were. Do we really want to rob our own futures?
