Top Five Unicorn Cycles

unicorn bike cycle
Written by Gary

unicorn bike cycle

The rainbow swiffer tail attachment is removable, in case you want to clean your rectum.

I don’t care whether you spent your childhood as a southern debutante or a football jock military brat, at some point you wanted to ride a unicorn. Unicorns are magical beasts that fart glitter and can heal your worst woes with their tears (which also taste like bacon frosting and democracy). The only problem with them is that they don’t technically exist. So, I have rounded up the top five unicorn cycles from inside the internet because if you can’t make it, you might as well fake it (If you don’t believe me, consult your orgasms).

unicorn bike cycle

This unicorn cycle has a stubby penis horn, for the more discerning, masculine consumer.

unicorn bike cycle

A unicorn bike made in Mexico. (Disclaimer: May or may not be stuffed full of marijuana).

unicorn bike cycle

We do not condone redheads riding unicorns. One huge problem is enough.

unicorn bike cycle

I don’t know if this is technically a unicorn, but its even gayer, so it qualifies.

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About the author


Gary is the gay guy that every girl wants to be, and every guy wants to be with (Mostly because he can't get pregnant). He is based in Manhattan, but loves traveling to exotic new people, and sleeping with interesting new places. He is an adventurous writer, digital artist, and game designer that will try almost anything if it makes a good story.
--Instagram: @garyadrianrandall --Twitter: @gadrianrandall

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