Facts about farting, because everyone should take note of these facts about flatulence.
I know that nobody likes to admit it, but everyone farts. Every time you are out at a restaurant, and you see your date slowly, almost imperceptibly raise up one butt cheek, he or she is farting. Every time your roommate is in the bathtub, and you hear random bubble break the surface followed by light laughter, he or she is farting. Every time you wake up in the middle of the night, freaking out because you are sleeping next to a stranger and you think you may have farted, he or she probably heard it, depending on whether or not you actually did it, which I have never been successful at figuring out.
READ MORE: Four Ways to Hide a Fart From Your Boyfriend
Regardless of anything, we all fart and should probably spend some time learning more about it. So enjoy these flatulent facts my friends, may you never fart in the dark again.
A fart is composed of 59% nitrogen, 21% hydrogen, 9% carbon dioxide, 7% methane, and 4% oxygen. I don’t know why I even bothered mentioning that, since I am sure nobody knows what it even means. #science
The noise produced by flatulence depends on the tightness of the sphincter, amount of gas, and force behind the fart. This explains a lot about any noises I might make after a great one-night stand.
Farts can actually be lit on fire, but its pretty dangerous since methane and hydrogen are pretty flammable. It’s also dangerous because idiots are contagious.
Most people fart at least 14 times a day, even if they don’t admit it.
Dead people can fart up to 3 hours after they die. The good news is that they probably have bigger problems.
Some cultures actually enjoy farting. The Indian tribe Yanomami from South America uses farts as a way of saying hello. I often use it as a way to say goodbye.
Farts leave the body at up to 10 miles per hour. So basically it’s like a bicycle coming out of your ass.
Termites are the species that farts the most, and their flatulence is the second largest natural source of methane emissions. I guess that’s their way of getting revenge on us for stepping on their homes.
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