I spent my Memorial Day Weekend in Fire Island and this first timer has only one thing to say: I can’t drink anymore. Although this secluded and car-free island has many great things to offer, there’s literally nothing to do aside from going to the beach, eating and drinking. Here are some pros and cons:
Pro: It takes a train, a shuttle and a ferry to get there – which makes it feel like you’re really getting away.
Con: It takes a train, a shuttle and a ferry to get there costing you an extra $50 at the very least.
Pro: No cars. You can walk everywhere which is great after you cleaned out at the bars.
Con: Good luck cleaning out at the bars. Everything on this island is more expensive than NYC.
Pro: Fire Island is a place where both NYC breeders and NYC gays had out to in search of drunk fun in the sun.
Con: Fire Island is very segregated based on sexual orientation. There’s a gay side and a straight side. BORING.
Pro: You’re isolated from everything, including wifi in most cases – so you have an excuse when you don’t answer your boss’ emails all weekend. Oops.
Con: You’re isolated from everything except your handful of friends who will never leave you alone. Oh, and that piece you hooked up with last night and ditched this morning? They’re sunbathing a few feet away from you on the beach – and they do look worse in the sunlight.
So here’s what I learned from Fire Island: Bring as much alcohol and food as your arms can carry. Everything is very expensive there (Cup o’ Noodles is $3). Be ready to be attached at the hip with everyone you’re sharing a house with. There’s no eating or drinking while walking. Sit down. And finally, and perhaps the most important lesson of all; don’t pet the adorable deer. They have tics.
