If you’ve been thinking to yourself that you need to put a little more time and effort into being cooler, that’s good. That’s a sign that you’re already totally disconnected from anything even remotely cool. Here’s a simple list in no particular order.
1. Irony is still in. Anything that you think is totally uncool is probably awesome in the outer boroughs of NYC, and we all know what happens there. The weird, trashy looking youths of Brooklyn make their body odors and suspenders so cool that mainstream retailers just can’t help but carry knock-off versions, thus perpetuating the cycle of cool to mainstream.
2. Be healthy. If you’re a muscle head, you’re not cool. If you resemble a sloth in lifestyle, you’re not cool. Your physical presence should project the image of “hey I’m out in the world and living my life non-stop.” Not, “hey I spend every single day trapped in a gym,” or “hey I haven’t smelled fresh air in like three weeks.”
3. Avoid body sprays and splashes of all varieties. If you feel inclined to buy AXE products, or body sprays with names like “cool pear mist” or “happy ocean breeze” you need to think again. This will never, ever work in your favor unless you’re so bad off that you simply cannot access a shower. Opt for natural scents, frequent bathing, and products with natural essential oils.
4. Pleats are back and A-okay! It’s 100% okay to wear a smart, pleated pant or skirt. It’s 2011, not 2004 when we were all “yo, the 80’s sucked.” The 80’s didn’t suck. The 80’s probably made you, so embrace them.
5. Don’t wear your labels on the outside. If you’re wearing logos all up on your sweater, dress, purse, or shoes… well, you’re a moron. Stop it. Shop for quality fabrics and detail, not a big fat Tory Burch logo that says “hey I work in middle management and am dying for a vacation to Central Delaware.”
If you have a heart and consider yourself a true friend, you’ll post this everywhere (especially on the walls of people that wear body spray and logos all over their purses).
Also, did anyone else just feel that earthquake all across NYC? The East Coast is being attacked by earthquake monsters.
photo [ via ]
