Bro –
This weekend, you decided to change your name. Again. To “Swag.” And frankly? I have so many issues with it that I’m invoicing you when my therapy bill arrives.
Listen, “Swag.” You’re on Twitter, right? Because the people I follow have already chewed up and spit out “Swag.” Like, three months ago. You’re supposed to be a tastemaker, not a garbage disposal where the once-buzzworthy hiphop lexicon goes to die. The “Swag” train has departed and derailed, and it seems like you’ve missed your stop. Quit sleepin’.
I’d expect a visionary like yourself to understand the importance of cohesive branding, so maybe you can explain how “Swag” fits into the personal brand you’ve spent the better part of two decades cultivating. It doesn’t start with a “P,” it isn’t some iteration of Daddy or Diddy, it has nothing to do with Puffing or Puffy or Puff. The only way “Swag” fits into your narrative is that you’ve once again re-christened yourself for seemingly no fucking reason.What, exactly, was wrong with Puff Daddy? What was wrong with P. Diddy? Diddy? Your real name? Is there a specific reason these don’t work for you anymore? Should America just accept that you’re Sean Piddy John Daddy Swaggy Combs, Man of Many Personality Disorders?
Ugh. If you want to reinvent yourself, have at it. This is America’s fault; we all over-zealously encouraged Prince when he became a symbol. …Maybe do something like that? Resurrect yourself as a color or an aura? And maybe wait until you have significant reason to do so. According to this video, you’d like to be called “Swag” because you got over a week-long flu and are alive. Congratulations on the personal victory, but Christ on a cracker already. Next time you get bored with being you, try dying your hair. It worked for Sisqo.
XO,
Steph
