So your husband never listens to you. Whenever you talk, he immediately tunes out, watches TV behind your head, plays Candy Crush on his phone, or starts masturbating. It seems like the more important your message, the less interested your husband is in discussing it. Have you ever dealt with this problem before? If so, listen up because I have a steaming nugget of knowledge to dump on you.
The problem may not be that he isn’t listening, it may be that you aren’t communicating properly. Here are three reasons that your husband may not be listening to you:
1.You talk too much.
People tend to overcompensate when they feel they aren’t being appreciated. Studys show that after about 15 minutes of ongoing yammering, a husband is likely to tune his wife out. This, in turn probably pisses the wife off, so she tries to talk longer, louder, and harder to try and drive home the point. If you really want effective communication, skip over all the flowery crap and get to the point. Guys respect a hard-hitting broad.
2. You choose the wrong time to talk.
I know you are saying that there is probably never a wrong time to talk, but if your husband sidles up to you when you are in the middle of a yoga pose, or while taking a long, stress-relieving bath you probably won’t want to talk either. If your husband is in the middle of a project, you can let him know that you want to talk about something, but let him finish his damn sand-blasting first. You will both be happier if you can communicate with no distractions.
3. You already expect that he won’t listen to you.
Like a self-fulfilling prophecy, if you expect that your husband won’t listen to you, then you probably won’t even bother trying to say anything interesting. This, in turn, will encourage him to not listen to you. If something is important enough to discuss in a marriage, its okay to ask him to give you his full attention. If he is busy, ask him when you can sit down, TURN OFF YOUR PHONES, and talk.
Marriage, like any life-long contractual agreement takes work, and relies completely on communication. If what you are doing isn’t working, try something else. You owe that to your husband, your marriage, and yourself.
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