Bulgarian proms are where good fashion goes to die.
I have made fun of Russia for a lot of things in the past, most of which revolve around how trashy the women dress, but Bulgaria has given me a gift today — and it’s the gift that seems to keep on giving far beyond their fabulously tasty interpretation of feta cheese. Formalwear throughout the world needs to stop, collaborate, and listen, because Bulgarian prom night is a spectacle that needs to be covered on all major media outlets. Are you listening, New York Times, because where are you for the REAL news — like this? I think this is why they say the mainstream media is skewed, but it’s hard to say. Anyway, let’s get back to Bulgarian prom disasters, shall we?
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Apparently in Bulgaria, prom is a time to pull out your craziest, sluttiest synthetic-fabric Halloween costume and combine it with lace leggings, big hair, and a spray tan. The women in these photos look like they were purchased from Russia via a catalog, began their new lives in Newark, New Jersey, then got jobs at a factory that specializes in jewel-tone polyester tutus for slutty, tasteless ballroom dancing mannequins. Am I the meanest gay man or what? I’m mostly kidding, because all women are beautiful, but I mean… sometimes too much is too much. There’s simply no reason you need that much sparkly spandex unless you have an Olympic baton routine.
They say a picture is worth a thousand words, but these photos are worth a lot more than that. I defy you to look at them without cringing.
