Reasons Why You Should Never Marry Someone Who Won’t Jump Off A Cliff With you

jumping off a cliff
Written by Gary

jumping off a cliff

For those of you who have been following my love life (If, in fact any of you are? Crickets?) I am no longer seeing the Englishman. I am now in the beginning stages of seeing a pretty awesome American (who makes up for the lack of accent by being genuinely bad-ass), and one of the things I like about him is that we have very similar views on life. We both believe that you are wasting your life if you don’t at least try to stuff it with as much adventure as possible, and finding someone to do that with you is the ultimate goal. Without giving too much away, we had a chat about weddings, and my wedding will definitely involve leaping off a cliff into the ocean. He said: “You had better hope you marry someone who isn’t afraid of heights,” to which I replied: “I don’t think I would marry someone who wouldn’t jump off a cliff for me, height-phobias notwithstanding.”

After I said it, I realized that it’s true.

Life is full of plenty of adventures, but if you find someone that you are willing to marry, its reasonable to assume that loving that person will be the greatest adventure of all. Not only do you have to find someone who isn’t a crack-head that sleep-rapes you, but they also have to be nurturing, like-minded, and willing to push you when you can’t push yourself. This, of course, involves being pushed off a cliff.

I know what kind of person I am, and what kind of person I need to be with (this after 15 years of testing the waters with dating). If a guy isn’t willing to put aside his fears (or, in fact face his fears with me at his side) then he absolutely isn’t the guy for me. If I were smarter, I would make the connection that jumping off a cliff is a metaphor for all of life’s problems, most of which married couples should face together, head on.

But for right now I am just talking about two guys, promising to spend their lives with each other, holding hands, and jumping into the unknown together.

Jumping off a cliff is the perfect way to say: “I don’t know where we are going, but we are going there as a team.”

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About the author


Gary is the gay guy that every girl wants to be, and every guy wants to be with (Mostly because he can't get pregnant). He is based in Manhattan, but loves traveling to exotic new people, and sleeping with interesting new places. He is an adventurous writer, digital artist, and game designer that will try almost anything if it makes a good story.
--Instagram: @garyadrianrandall --Twitter: @gadrianrandall

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