Judge of your natural character by what you do in your dreams. –Ralph Waldo Emerson
1. I Wore ZERO Underpants This Weekend. You know when I knew that Superbowl weekend was going to be wildly good? When I got to Dallas, looked in my bag, and noticed I hadn’t packed any underpants. Initially I was disappointed in myself, but then I realized that this minor wardrobe error would only improve the quality of my first Superbowl experience. And it did.
2. Am I Growing A Penis? I mean, basically this weekend was filled with football, ESPN, men chanting things (yeah, I got in there too), drinkin’ beer, screaming about fumbles and such, and eating meat. In fact, I can’t recall eating any substantial fruits or veggies on Saturday or Sunday. It’s been a long time since I’ve spent several consecutive days with a man, and I had forgotten that the cornerstone of the man diet is meat and carbs. I’m pretty sure I’m fighting scurvy now as a result (I’m sipping ruby red grapefruit juice as I type this), but it was entirely worth it. And, if I end up really growing a penis I think it’ll be exciting to aim for a change.
sidenote: there’s a 50/50 chance of me getting dumped for writing all this penis stuff… I doubt my boyfriend is going to be turned on by this.
3. Waffle House. Oh, f*ck yeah! I haven’t eaten at a Waffle House since my days back in Florida. For those of you who don’t know me all that well yet, I used to live there, and I super duper loved it. I ate at classy joints like Waffle House all the time. Two eggs over medium, whole wheat toast, cheese grits on the side. Sitting in a Waffle House for the first time in a few years sort of felt like going home. It was safe, familiar, and the food perked up my tastebuds like the way I imagine other people’s do on Christmas morning. Bonus? Boyfriend was pretty pumped that on our first trip away together my only real demand was an $11 breakfast (for 2 people).
4. Stop Hating The Halftime. I actually never liked Fergie and the gang before the halftime show. Now I do. In person it was incredible to watch, fun to be a part of, and I’m pretty sure there was a brief moment in time when I thought about having Usher’s baby. That moment was when he flew up into the air and landed in a split. So, everyone should just calm down about it. It was great and it boils down to one thing- it’s just hard to accurately convey the energy in a room (or stadium) via television.
Enjoy all this spicy jazz:
Pretty much everything about this post except the football crap has made me fall in love with you. Well, the Penis part anyway. Specifically yes, the penis part. Penis.
I wish I had your weekend! You crack me up!
@adrianrand- i hope we make out some day soon. i hope you also get straight sooner than later so you at least enjoy making out with me.
@fellinilover- i wish you were there and i hope i make it back to tejas soon… more specifically houston!