Bryce Gruber’s Thoughts of the Day (controversies edition)

Written by Bryce

Gender Bending, Kids, & Champagne Ballz.

Today’s thoughts are brought to you by my wallet being over $300 lighter in a totally stupid way. I locked myself out of my apartment and had to call a locksmith that obviously needed to replace a good portion of my door after whipping out a series of drills because obviously I had a pretty high-tech lock. Oh, did I mention that I was stranded in my hallway with my 2 year old and the 5 year old that I was babysitting? The good news is that the 5 year old taught my 2 year old how to make new and unusual fake farting sounds.

1) Gender Bending is OK in My House. Well, I should back up and explain that. I was raised with pretty traditional values, and I think my son is being raised with semi-traditional values (I say “semi” because single, never-wed mothers hardly qualify for the role of traditional mom) but that has nothing to do with the fact that every damn person on this Earth deserves to be happy in my eyes. If you come to the Grubah house you’re awesome whether you’re a right wing Christian (have several of those as friends),Β  a left wing drag queen (too many in my contact list to count), or anything in between or even beyond. We spent the better part of the day entertaining some of my more flamboyant friends, and I somehow feel like a better parent for exposing my child to an array of life options from the start so he knows that he’ll be loved and accepted no matter who, how, or what he becomes.

2) Yes, It’s the *Gruber* House. I get asked this question all the time through our blog email, my personal email, facebook, twitter, etc- so here’s the answer. My son’s last name is hyphenated, and Gruber is the first part of that hyphenation. Why? Because I think it takes two people to make a baby, and if both people don’t share a name (we weren’t married), why is it expected for the child to? I happen to think it’s beautiful when a baby takes his/her father’s name… it suggests the idea of a man enveloping a family and supporting them physically, emotionally, financially, and in whatever other ways. I just also happen to believe that if a man isn’t necessarily offering all those things that a woman should be able to stamp her name all over her baby too- as in “don’t you forget that I carried you in every way shape and form for 18 years, kid.”

3) Will All My Children Be Grubers? Probably not, and here’s why: if I ever go down the route of having more biological children, I plan to be married. I’m not trying to make a habit of this unwed mother biz… it’s hard work, and I have zero jewelry to show for it (just kidding!). But, if I ever do get married, I assume it’ll be to someone that I’m completely in love with and proud to take the name of. I’ll keep y’all posted on that;) If I don’t have any more biological children, I still have every intention of adopting a couple more rug rats at some point in my mid 30’s. They’ll be Grubers by environment (Lord have mercy on their sweet souls), but not by blood (proof of mercy from above).

4) Why is this bag so freak-tastically-awesome?! Thanks,, for making me drool again.

About the author


Bryce Gruber is a Manhattanite mom who can be found jet-setting off to every corner of the globe. She loves exotic places, planes with WiFi, summer clothes, & Sucre brown butter truffles. Bryce's aim is to do to luxury what Elton John did to being gay. Follow her on twitter @brycegruber

Leave a Comment