There are plenty of ways in which life fucks you over, but perhaps the most annoying is the particular irony in the way that youth fades. You will never be more physically beautiful than when you are young, but youth comes with insecurity.
So basically we are running around looking hot as hell but not confident enough to really enjoy it. By the time we are comfortable in our own skin, said skin has started to sag, which totally blows. I am the kind of gay who thinks about solutions rather than problems though, so here are five ways to appreciate your body while you are still young.
1. Stop comparing yourself to others. I know this seems as impossible as saying no when your ex-boyfriend wants to come over for a quick hummer, but a good way to accomplish this is to remember that everybody compares themselves to others. That means that people are constantly comparing themselves to you, too. If you think of it that way, it becomes a lot easier to take yourself out of that rat race and stop obsessing about the petite areolas of the girl next to you at the gym. Your dinner plate areolas are fabulous, and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
2. Really look at yourself naked. I don’t know if everyone else does this, but when it comes to my body I tend to ignore the parts of it that I don’t like. This does nothing to get rid of any insecurities because the more you ignore something, the more prominent it becomes. A better way to go about gaining some self-esteem is to take the time to really look at yourself naked. Normally we play negative things up in our heads so that they become larger than they need to be (penises notwithstanding). I bet if you stare long enough you will realize that your ass isn’t as big as you think. Make yourself a promise that you won’t stop looking into the mirror until you find 10 good things about you.
3. Go skinny dipping. There is nothing more freeing than free-balling it in the water. Skinny dipping is a good way to ease into getting comfortable with being naked in public because you have a buffer of water to hide your fupa.
4. Sleep around. Being comfortable with your body sometimes involves sharing it with others. If you fear being naked in front of other people, sometimes the best thing to do is jump in head-first. Arrange a one-night-stand and then just drop trou completely. You will probably never see the person again, so it doesn’t really matter what they think, and even if you asked them they probably wouldn’t tell you the truth anyway, so chuck it in the fuck it bucket and hop onto a dick. Just make sure to wrap it up, or your sexy young body might end up with a baby in it, just when you were getting comfortable in your size 6 jeggings.
5. Be physically active. I am 30, and my knees make a cracking noise every time I get up. I don’t care if you live in the heart of Manhattan or the wilds of Africa, there is no excuse to not be physically active. Your body is an amazing fucking machine, and you need to use it in every way you can, while you are still young enough to walk to the toilet unassisted. Also, fun fact: your metabolism slows down after you turn 30, so if you are in your 20s and having trouble maintaining weight, it doesn’t get better. It gets worse. Get outside, get active, and appreciate your beautiful body. After all, its the only one you will ever have.
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