Pessimist– You believe the glass is half empty, and that you will never find love again. I went on a date with a pessimist this week and I got so depressed I nearly passed myself away (it wasn’t his fault, he came from a third world country i.e. the real world). Pessimists have a generally negative view of their lives, and expect the worst. Breakups are great for pessimists because it proves their point that they will never be happy. So if you are a pessimist, how do you deal with a breakup gracefully? Find other pessimists. Find a group of other complaining bitches to hang around. Sit around, drink red wine, and complain and bitch to each other about your lives until you hit rock bottom and one of you hangs herself in the bathroom. Then realize (from hearing other people be so negative) that there is a silver lining to everything, and if you found one guy or girl that could put up with your shit, you will find another. Then, if you don’t already live there, move to New York.
