I tell you, some weird shit goes on in this world. I was lucky enough to be there for the birth of my first nephew, and lucky that my sister had enough of a sense of humor (and lack of fucks-to-give) to snap a pic of her afterbirth so we could discuss it afterwards. Having a baby is kind of a big deal no matter where you live in the world, and every country has its own customs. Here are three strange ways to welcome your newborn baby, taken from countries around the world.
Japanese Umbilical Cord Mementos.
Japanese hospitals send mothers home with gift boxes including the umbilical cords, and a creepy little kimono-wearing doll that represents the baby. The new mother can unfold the kimono, and tuck the umbilical cord inside, to keep her baby’s first organ intact for the rest of time. All I have to say is ew.
Finnish Baby Bed Boxes.
In Finland, as a reward for popping out a baby, you get an infant car package box including clothes, sheets, toys, and even (technically) a bed, since cribs are really nothing more than boxes with bars.
The care package boxes were originally only available for low-income mothers, but have since been expanded to include everyone and to symbolize that all babies start out as equals.
Mothers in Finland can either take the box, or receive a cash grant for about $190USD, leading me to believe that Finland is actually just a European game show and doesn’t exist in real life. Honestly, can you say that you have any proof Finland is a real place? Didn’t think so.
Armenian Baby Divination and Witchcraft
Since Armenians all dabble in the black arts (the Kardashian sisters are basically the reborn Sanderson sisters from Hocus Pocus), Armenian babies take part in a divination ritual when they lose their first tooth to ascertain their future. The babies are surrounded by objects that symbolize various professions, and whichever toy they approach divines their future career. I generally think this is a cute idea, but it leaves me wondering how they can tell if a baby is going to grow up to be a prostitute or drug dealer. I don’t think leaving penises and crack needles laying about is safe for infants.
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