While Christmas has much to offer (like the promise of Twilight Zone marathons, 24 hours of A Christmas Story on TBS, and the ever-so-rare break from work), the one thing that makes me all “STFU, Christmas” is the music. You go into the bank, and it’s playing. You go grocery shopping, and it’s playing. Look, I don’t give a shit if this rendition of “O Holy Night” is “different” because it’s sung by Michael Buble, Christina Aguilera, and the baby Jesus himself. I don’t want to hear it anymore. It has not become any more entertaining or profound since I last heard it, ten minutes ago.
Scrooge-y? Yes. But how much can a woman take? My breaking point came last week when my brother walked into my office to inform me that Lite FM was playing Christmas music, and why don’t I listen to that instead of whatever crunchy rave shit I was listening to? Well. After I recovered from the shock that an easy-listening radio station was playing Christmas music a week before Christmas, I got atop my high horse to inform my brother that I was already listening to Christmas music. Distorted Disco Christmas music, to be specific.
Distorted Disco Christmas is a collection of non-Christmasy Christmas music best suited for anyone who can’t stomach another traditional carol; yet secretly has a soft spot for the holiday somewhere in the pit of their black soul. Compiled by Drew Harris of Blalock’s Indie/Rock Playlist, the album has just a touch of Christmas cheer (which is to say; barely any. In fact, I’m pretty sure half of the songs have nothing to do with Christmas, save for the album name.) And for some of us, that’s a real Christmas miracle. Download it for free here.
