Masturbating to Mary Tyler Moore is apparently a thing, even in this day and age.
I know this may seem hard to believe, but Mary Tyler Moore was a total hottie back in the day. I’ve never really thought about Mary Tyler Moore that way (she’s no Jane Fonda, after all), but I guess I can totally see it if I take into account that beauty standards have changed a lot in the past few decades. So, it brings me great pleasure (I love puns so much) to introduce you to The Mary Tyler Moore Masturbation Society via their flyer. (Click here for an easier-to-read version that won’t make your eyes bleed).
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The society for masturbating to Mary Tyler Moore was originally founded by a guy named James J. Kagel from Cleveland, who was trying to connect with others who shared his fetish for jacking off to America’s sweetheart, good ole’ MTM.
Kagel freely admits that he beats his meat to Mary Tyler Moore’s legs, and says that his wife bears a slight resemblance to the actress.
I’m happy that this guy is letting his freak flag fly, so (assuming that he is still alive), I fully support having a fetish and trying to connect with others who share your passion. As I write this, I am getting out my old typewriter and glue-stick, because I am about to start the ‘Michael Fassbender Masturbation Society’ as the founder and president. You probably won’t see me for a few weeks, but that’s because I will be watching Shame on repeat and single-handedly keeping the Kleenex industry afloat.
In the event that masturbating to Mary Tyler Moore is still a thing, btw, please feel free to leave an anonymous comment below and describe how exactly you got to this point in your life.
